As I looked upon his sleeping, angelic face, my heart melted each and every time. I know he won't recall how when he was a baby I held him every night until he fell asleep but I have never forgotten the love I felt as I gently tucked him in, always being so very careful to not disturb his dreams.  And always tiptoeing back before retiring myself to lightly kiss that silky soft cheek one last time as I ended my day. I won't tell you even now how many years that ritual continued. Suffice it to say, the cheek was definitely less soft and silky before that nightly visit  to say my private little goodnight ended, and not without very real pangs of sadness that the time had come to pack it away with the rest of my memories.

Life has many triumphs and trials. I wanted to be there to share in his joys, to be his shoulder when he needed to cry, and to protect him from all the evils of this world. There was so much I wanted to teach him but I always knew many lessons would have to be the ones he learned himself. And some of those lessons would be difficult and cause him pain. And I knew he would fail at times, just as we all do. We want to spare our children from the pain of failure and the mistakes we made when we were young but  of course we cannot, all we can do is our very best to prepare them for life and always be there and hope and pray that they will never, ever doubt our love for them.

 Most assuredly there were missteps along the way on my part as I was a very young mother and also still very much in the process of growing up myself when my son was born but never did my love wane or diminish even for a second from the very first time I held him in my arms. He was my world from the instant his tiny hand first grasped my finger. I knew in that moment I would give my life to protect him from harm and I also knew my heart was his for life.

 As time passed and his world expanded there were times I would have given anything to handle his problems for him but I knew doing so would have harmed him far more than the problem of the moment so there were times Mommy let him stumble knowing he might fall and all I could do was be there to to pick him up and hold him close to me hoping my love would comfort. I wonder if that isn't one of the most difficult  aspects of being a parent.  Being able to recognize when the most loving act you can perform is to do nothing. I know it was for me. And I didn't always succeed.  I suppose the answer is that I was learning right along with my little boy and  was always very aware that because he was my only child there was a very real danger I would over protect him and handicap his ability to deal with life standing proudly on his own two feet. Learning how and when to let go was a lesson I knew had to be learned, and thank goodness had the good sense to heed, however reluctantly.

 At times it was a rough trip but looking back now I would not change a moment of that time. To me he will still always be that precious little angel sleeping so soundly, safe and content all snuggled into his blankets. Nothing has, or will ever change the feelings I had then as I watched over him, even time cannot ever take those memories from me, but today I look at the man he has become and am as filled with love as on that day he first gripped my finger so long ago. Being his mother has been the very best adventure of my life and  it is one I am so tremendously grateful to have had the joy of experiencing.

 One last thing. To all the young mothers who are now so very privileged as to be in the midst of experiencing these early years with your little angels. I cannot stress enough that you must cherish every single moment. They pass into history so very quickly. Please don't ever take them for granted or miss  even a single minute of this wonderful time. I promise you these moments will warm your heart as long as you live.