Slim's Place - Mom's Retribution

OK, I decided it's time to lighten up a bit. I know I tend to be too serious at times. But I do know we all need to laugh occasionally, particularly these days. Sooo .. I decided to share something I think every Mother will understand and maybe even chuckle as she reads.

I didn't write this and have no idea who did but I sure do like the author's sense of humour. If anyone does know who the author is, please let me know so I can give the well deserved credit to the lady.I am assuming it's a lady as only a Mother could really appreciate this. I'm certain we have all thought at times how much we would like to do something exactly like this if for no other reason than to see the look on our kids' faces. Mind you, they might just decide it's time to lock Mom up as she has finally flipped out. Can't you just imagine the consternation as they see this performance ? Poetic justice, indeed.

I can see a family meeting coming up to decide just what to do with "poor old Mom" !

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WHEN I'M AN OLD LADY

When I'm an old lady I'll live with each kid
And bring so much happiness, just as they did
I want to pay back all the joy they've provided
Returning each deed. Oh, they'll be so excited !
(When I'm an old lady and live with my kids)

I'll write on the wall with reds,whites and blues,
And I'll bounce on the furniture wearing my shoes
I'll drink from the carton and then leave it out
I'll stuff all the toilets and oh, how they'll shout!
(When I'm an old lady and live with my kids)

When they're on the phone and just out of reach
I'll get into things like sugar and bleach
Oh, they'll snap their fingers and then shake their head
And when that is done I'll hide under the bed !
(When I'm an old lady and live with my kids)

When they cook dinner and call me to eat
I'll not eat my green beans or salad or meat
I'll gag on my okra, spill milk on the table
And when they get angry, I'll run, if I'm able !
(When I'm an old lady and live with my kids)

I'll sit close to the TV, through the channels I'll click
I'll cross both eyes just to see if they stick
I'll take off my socks and throw one away
And play in the mud till the end of the day !
(When I'm an old lady and live with my kids)

And later in bed, I'll lay back and sigh
I'll thank God in prayer and then close my eyes
My kids will look down with a smile slowly creeping
And say with a groan, "She's so sweet when she's sleeping!"

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MIDI "Makin' Whoopee" courtesy of Les Gorven

August 26th 2007